Plumpudding Hill

My cousin Mandy died suddenly on 18 April 2010.

I wonder where you were, the day you heard
that Mandy died.
No, it cannot be, not Mandy, no, we cried.
Some moments, like the death of Princess Di,
Ingrain themselves into the mind
But close to home, do more:
Break time in two, define
Before, and Now.

May I share where I was, the day I heard?
A mountainside, not far from home.
Plumpudding Hill on Devils Peak, the view sublime.
I took the call (the wretched phone
rang deep inside my bag). It was my wife
My own dear wife
To break the awful news.

No, not Mandy, no, not now
So young, too soon, so full of love and life,
My cousin, no
Her children – husband – mother – father – brothers – us
How can they – how can we all – go on?

But on we go.
I stumbled home, to go to the bedside
To say goodbye,
Too late of course,
To see for one last time
Her face, her hair, golden on the pillow.

Now, every day, I see that mountainside,
A backdrop to my life,
Identify the windswept spot
Plumpudding Hill on Devils Peak
Remember Mandy and recall
Her smile, her laugh, her love, her life
The breeze, the smell, the view
Not just the day, the place, the time, and how I cried